Your words are simply perfect. I think so many people forget that relationships are hard work. My hubby and I keep choosing and showing up for each other each day. We just celebrated 37 years of marriage and it gets better every day. This year has been particularly hard with a job loss and a cancer journey but each day we help hold each other up and we continue to make it work.💜
I love this. And, a soulmate doesn't have to just be a romantic partner. It can be a friend, a parent, a sibling, or even a pet. And you're not limited to just one! Because of this, for me, "love of my life" holds so much more importance and meaning. My husband isn't one for lovey-dovey gestures and I had to tell him early on that, to quote myself, "I need the words." He drops "love of my life" every now and again into casual conversations and it always surprises me a little bit, in the best possible way.
Thank you for these words. I’m going through a hard time in my relationship and my first instinct is to get irritated, angry, and want to give up. This post reminded me of a lot that I tend to forget during the harder times. Thanks 💚
I’ve always thought of my husband as my person. He complements my quirks and weaknesses while I do the same for him. Twenty year later I feel comfortable calling him the love of my life. I can’t imagine loving another person as much as I do him or finding somebody to love me unconditionally like he does.
I think a soulmate isn't necessarily the person you're coupled with. I think it can be anyone whose soul mirrors yours and you have an understanding of why the universe put you together.
I feel like my (late) son was my soulmate. Nobody else on earth's spirit could match mine the way his did.
I think the idea of soulmates, like a lot of things in life, is a color wheel. it's not black and white, or a binary; it looks different and complex and unique and blurred all the time in really lovely ways. I think you can have multiple soulmates, and I say that because I feel as if I do have multiple soulmates. the way my best friend feels like my other half, the way my husband is the love of my life (something we've said to each other too), the way my other dear friend and I have known each other since middle school and are still close even tho we've changed who we are a million times. these are my soulmates. they uplift my spirit and complement my soul, and I love them dearly.
but I do think "soulmates" and the like is different for every person. I certainly don't expect someone to have the same definition as me. we are all shaped differently and have different needs, and that must be okay, because it's not right to fit someone's shape into a space they actually don't fit in.
Do you feel like you and Jacob were destined to be together? I naturally attribute soulmate (similarly to you) as something otherworldly and thus put fate in a similar bucket. Really curious what your perspective is on fate! I think you two were destined to be together and come back together so it feels like a soulmate and also, the love of your life!?
Hmmm I don’t know if I believe we were “destined” - I think I had to take that word out of my vocabulary. I believe we were both led to a certain point in which we met, but that we’re together and so happy because we did the work that was necessary
Isabel, yes!!!! The word “agency” has changed my own life; understanding I have a choice in what happens in my life. The choosing holds so much power and weight, and lifts the obligation to stay in something that isn’t serving for all the reasons you mentioned. I was shackled to “soulmate” for so long. Once I broke those chains, I was able to see more clearly the power of choice. Also, I’m so happy for Fonda and her forever family!! ♥️
Soulmate to me is being with my husband for now 26 years!
US wanting to make it work...US showing up for each other every day...US being committed...US communicating...US living this life together...US focusing on the next 26 years...US and well, our chocolate lab Ben :)
I agree - love is a choice and I chose my hubby and he chose me and we work hard to keep to keep choosing each other every day ❤️ Thanks love for this.
I was always suspicious of the soulmate concept. There are billions of people on the Earth but only one is supposed to be "the one"? For me, that defied logic. But what I love about love is that it's not finite. It's possible to have more than one "love of my life" in a lifetime. While that implies that there will be pain, it also opens up beautiful possibilities.
I have been married almost 48 years and we dated for 5 years before that. We were high school sweethearts. My young colleagues used to ask how I knew he was the one and still is. I would answer by saying that I still get excited especially when we’ve been apart when I see him. My heart flutters and I feel happy!! Nothing is ever perfect and relationships require work, hard work but it’s worth it when you been your heart skip a beat around that person. By the way I have never referred to him as my soul mate!!❤️💜
Whether you use "soulmate" or "love of my life", I think what's most important here —and what a lot of people are squeamish about— is the concept of love being a "choice". I'm a romantic who fell in love pretty instantly with my person (7 years later we're married with 3 dogs and our first baby on the way!), but I still view long-term partnership as a choice. We don't necessarily choose who we fall in love with, but we do choose who to build a life with. I chose to marry my husband not only because I love him; I made an informed decision based on how we've tackled everything life has thrown at us over the years (parental deaths, cross-country moves, job loss, you name it). He makes the hard stuff easier and the good stuff even better. Loving someone is a choice and an act, not just a feeling. We choose to accept our partners as they are right now and to love them as they grow into the people they will become. We choose to work through problems if/when they arise instead of running away from them. Viewing love as a choice rather than something just happens to us is pretty romantic to me.
Your words are simply perfect. I think so many people forget that relationships are hard work. My hubby and I keep choosing and showing up for each other each day. We just celebrated 37 years of marriage and it gets better every day. This year has been particularly hard with a job loss and a cancer journey but each day we help hold each other up and we continue to make it work.💜
37 years!!! What a gift 🥹
I love this. And, a soulmate doesn't have to just be a romantic partner. It can be a friend, a parent, a sibling, or even a pet. And you're not limited to just one! Because of this, for me, "love of my life" holds so much more importance and meaning. My husband isn't one for lovey-dovey gestures and I had to tell him early on that, to quote myself, "I need the words." He drops "love of my life" every now and again into casual conversations and it always surprises me a little bit, in the best possible way.
It makes my heart flutter too!!!
I needed this reminder thank you
❤️❤️❤️❤️
Thank you for these words. I’m going through a hard time in my relationship and my first instinct is to get irritated, angry, and want to give up. This post reminded me of a lot that I tend to forget during the harder times. Thanks 💚
I love this. Keep choosing each other! 🥹
I love that photo of you two🤍
Same! One of my favs
I’ve always thought of my husband as my person. He complements my quirks and weaknesses while I do the same for him. Twenty year later I feel comfortable calling him the love of my life. I can’t imagine loving another person as much as I do him or finding somebody to love me unconditionally like he does.
“My person” is so simple and so lovely
I think a soulmate isn't necessarily the person you're coupled with. I think it can be anyone whose soul mirrors yours and you have an understanding of why the universe put you together.
I feel like my (late) son was my soulmate. Nobody else on earth's spirit could match mine the way his did.
Yes! Children, friends, parents, or dogs too :)
I was going to mention dogs but didn't want to sound like a lunatic 😁 100% a dog can be a soulmate! Mine is.
Simon is ABSOLUTELY my soulmate
I think the idea of soulmates, like a lot of things in life, is a color wheel. it's not black and white, or a binary; it looks different and complex and unique and blurred all the time in really lovely ways. I think you can have multiple soulmates, and I say that because I feel as if I do have multiple soulmates. the way my best friend feels like my other half, the way my husband is the love of my life (something we've said to each other too), the way my other dear friend and I have known each other since middle school and are still close even tho we've changed who we are a million times. these are my soulmates. they uplift my spirit and complement my soul, and I love them dearly.
but I do think "soulmates" and the like is different for every person. I certainly don't expect someone to have the same definition as me. we are all shaped differently and have different needs, and that must be okay, because it's not right to fit someone's shape into a space they actually don't fit in.
I love this and totally agree! My definition has changed over time as well ❤️
Do you feel like you and Jacob were destined to be together? I naturally attribute soulmate (similarly to you) as something otherworldly and thus put fate in a similar bucket. Really curious what your perspective is on fate! I think you two were destined to be together and come back together so it feels like a soulmate and also, the love of your life!?
Hmmm I don’t know if I believe we were “destined” - I think I had to take that word out of my vocabulary. I believe we were both led to a certain point in which we met, but that we’re together and so happy because we did the work that was necessary
i love this perspective. thank you for taking the time to share!
Isabel, yes!!!! The word “agency” has changed my own life; understanding I have a choice in what happens in my life. The choosing holds so much power and weight, and lifts the obligation to stay in something that isn’t serving for all the reasons you mentioned. I was shackled to “soulmate” for so long. Once I broke those chains, I was able to see more clearly the power of choice. Also, I’m so happy for Fonda and her forever family!! ♥️
Yes!!! I completely agree
I love this! Have a great time on your trip.
Thank you!!!
Soulmate to me is being with my husband for now 26 years!
US wanting to make it work...US showing up for each other every day...US being committed...US communicating...US living this life together...US focusing on the next 26 years...US and well, our chocolate lab Ben :)
Can’t forget Ben!!! 🥹
I agree - love is a choice and I chose my hubby and he chose me and we work hard to keep to keep choosing each other every day ❤️ Thanks love for this.
Love!! 🥰
I was always suspicious of the soulmate concept. There are billions of people on the Earth but only one is supposed to be "the one"? For me, that defied logic. But what I love about love is that it's not finite. It's possible to have more than one "love of my life" in a lifetime. While that implies that there will be pain, it also opens up beautiful possibilities.
I have been married almost 48 years and we dated for 5 years before that. We were high school sweethearts. My young colleagues used to ask how I knew he was the one and still is. I would answer by saying that I still get excited especially when we’ve been apart when I see him. My heart flutters and I feel happy!! Nothing is ever perfect and relationships require work, hard work but it’s worth it when you been your heart skip a beat around that person. By the way I have never referred to him as my soul mate!!❤️💜
Whether you use "soulmate" or "love of my life", I think what's most important here —and what a lot of people are squeamish about— is the concept of love being a "choice". I'm a romantic who fell in love pretty instantly with my person (7 years later we're married with 3 dogs and our first baby on the way!), but I still view long-term partnership as a choice. We don't necessarily choose who we fall in love with, but we do choose who to build a life with. I chose to marry my husband not only because I love him; I made an informed decision based on how we've tackled everything life has thrown at us over the years (parental deaths, cross-country moves, job loss, you name it). He makes the hard stuff easier and the good stuff even better. Loving someone is a choice and an act, not just a feeling. We choose to accept our partners as they are right now and to love them as they grow into the people they will become. We choose to work through problems if/when they arise instead of running away from them. Viewing love as a choice rather than something just happens to us is pretty romantic to me.